A Merry White Christmas
Where to start. I had such a wonderful Christmas and holiday!!! I am so so so thankful to have been surrounded by friends and family. I guess I’ll start off with a few points: 1. this is the first year where I’ve truly felt ‘old’ for Christmas. Not old, but you know, I felt sort of how a parent (I assume) feels during Christmas. It wasn’t about me. There wasn’t a feeling of magic but rather, gratefulness for the things that I already do have, and the desire to make those that I love happy. Maybe I also don’t desire anything else because I already feel fulfilled with what I do have. I’d rather spend my time in service rather than dwell on material things. When my mom asked me what I wanted for Christmas, the best that I could find was an electric toothbrush (because Scott has one and it is incredible! Who knew! And no I did not use the same brush, although to be honest I don’t think I’d mind) or maybe a CD pack of ‘Sex And The City’ (a guilty pleasure. I love it!) . The truth is that this year, I really just wanted to focus on family. I enjoyed making handmade holiday cards, paintings and buying thoughtful gifts for those that I love. I hope all of you had a great holiday too, filled with some time to relax and be around those that are important to you. I personally was able to spend Christmas morning with my family in LA; we opened presents and enjoyed each other’s company. In the evening, I flew out to Boise, Idaho to meet up with Scott & his family in Eagle. Unfortunately, I started documenting and writing in my journal a few days into the trip, so I may miss a few details. But here’s what I have, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
Just a teeny tiny preface: Eagle is the town that Scott grew up in, and both of his parents live there. (On second thought, maybe I shouldn’t share too much private information, so I’ll try to keep it as much about me as possible. Haha).
The airplane touched down in Boise at around 11:30 pm. The plane ride was only about an hour and a half, and I’d made a small friend in the meantime. I forgot her name, but she was a lovely lady and was very open with speaking to me. (I was surprised, because I’m usually the one that starts conversation) . Her son was in a band, and so we bonded on the fact that we both had loved ones that were musicians. Anyhow. Scott was waiting for me at the airport, and I was so excited to see him! It’d been a week, which felt sort of like an eternity. It was fine. It’s always fine, and I’m always (pretty much) happy. But being together is always better.
There was something a little off about Scott though- his scent was completely different. He smelled like campfire, which is fine, but for some reason I felt as though the [olfactory] sensors in my brain were searching desperately for that calming, familiar smell. WHERE IS THE MAN I KNOW!? Isn’t it interesting how important sense of smell is? Before you depict me as a crazy lady, I must first let you know that I am not! When I was on set for a fragrance campaign with Michel Comte this past year, I had the privilege of learning about hormones and particular scents that attract a female to their partner. Our bodies are genetically inclined to go after a male that suits our morphology to a T. Why do we think that our significant other smells delicious? The truth is that this is because 1. we are in love, but 2. most importantly, we’d make healthy babies and reproduce well. So naturally, this is why I’d rather have sweaty not-showered Scott than campfire Scott. It’s calming. OK SORRY if that was weird. Moving on! (but you maybe learned something, right!?)
In the morning, it was time to open presents with the families. I was so shocked and overwhelmed with the love that everyone had given me. They’d thought of me when I wasn’t expecting a single thing. We started the day at Scott’s mom’s house, which was fully decorated with Santas in every corner of the house. It was a beautiful sight to see because this year my LA house was pretty low key. Just sweet. Scott handed me a big box. I opened it, and there was a book of our year together in pictures (with adorable dialogue). I smiled and laughed because as I opened this, he was opening the present that I’d given him- the same thing!!! I’d made a scrapbook too. We both laughed because hey- great minds think alike. Only for me, that wasn’t it. After removing the scrapbook, I saw that there were boxes inside of boxes. I opened the tens of lids, to eventually find something wrapped in tissue paper. It was a beautiful, beautiful, vintage watch from the 1950’s. It suited me perfectly. (my French grandma would be happy- yay! I’m a real woman now! “a real woman wears a watch, and is never late!”). I was so grateful for this beautiful gift. Scott said “no, there’s more. keep going”. WHAT? How? Oh, but there was. I peeled off a couple layers of tissue paper and stumbled upon a black velvet ring box. My heart raced for a second, until I quickly reminded myself that surely Scott wouldn’t propose to me then and there. We’ve still got to talk about a few things before that happens. Anyhow it was the most beautiful, simple, chic, sleek rose gold band with pave diamonds. It is the most perfect ring that I could ever want. I love having something special from him with me everywhere I go. It’s great. I am the luckiest girl. (thank you Scott!!!)
I don’t quite remember what happened for the rest of that day, but I do know that eventually Scott’s mom Anne took us out to dinner. She loves nice food, and she’s a wonderful cook. I can relate to her love of food and admire her ability to magically come up with a beautifully delicious dish. It’s a shame that I can’t remember the name of the restaurant, but it was DIVINE. Oh my. I’ll ask Scott to remind me of the name; if you’re EVER in Eagle Idaho, this is a place to go. You never know! So anyway- over the course of a week, Scott and I stayed a few days in Eagle. I love Eagle. It’s green, calm, and safe. I went out on a run (as Scott was helping his mom buy a new computer), and although I almost smacked my face on the pavement a few times (because of ice), it was the best. The air was pure and my body felt like a puppy that just saw its owners come home. It wanted to keep on running and breathing. I was ecstatic to have felt this way. We enjoyed family and had the opportunity to see a few of Scott’s long-time friends- particularly, Garrett & his wife Jacqueline (we call her Jackie (?), Jacqui(?) but I’m not sure how to spell it). On our last night in Eagle before flying back to LA for Scott’s NYE show with Fitz & The Tantrums, Jackie (ugh I feel like that’s not how it’s spelled! But moving on) invited me to go with her to a zumba-like dance class, ‘DIVA Dance Fitness’. It was ‘neon night’, so everyone wore white or fluorescent colors as we danced with black lights. It was SO fun. And SO hard- but i’m fit?! So I’ll blame it either on my uncoordinated ability to shake my hips, or maybe the fact that I ate too many chocolates that day. I was thankful for the black lights because 1. No one could see my face of struggle and 2. No one could know who the girl that couldn’t dance sexy was. It was perfect. *** I think that I can dance sexy, but i’m telling you these girls had MOVES. Maybe I’m just more goofy. I don’t know if you could take me seriously. Oh whatever. Haha***
Just another teeny tiny preface: Scott’s dad Jim has a beautiful cabin in the mountains of McCall, Idaho. Scott and I had gone once during our summer road-trip, but this time we had the chance to have a winter wonderland and stay there for a few days. McCall is a wonderfully secluded place where the people are warm and nature is abundant. It’s also a place where huckleberries grow, and so it’s automatically a place of magic to me. Here’s a diary entry that I’d started on one of the last days spent there:
I woke up slowly to a whispered “Jim! Jim! There’s deer!”. As I gently rose out of my sleepy conscience I realized that it was Scott’s sister Meg, calling to her dad. My first thought was “how lovely it is to wake up like this, in a nice warm cabin in a snowy wonderland”. On second thought, I knew that because everyone was awake, it meant that I too, pretty soon, would have to haul out of my warm blankets and get dressed for a day of skiing.
But first, I was motivated to quietly climb down the bunk bed latter and leap across the cabin to find Scott who was quietly and so sweetly asleep on the couch. His little nose was nuzzled under the covers and his soft long hair gently rested on his sweet sweet head, little strands tucking softly around his perfect little ears. I kissed his forehead and a little smile grew on his face. So, I kissed him again and he pulled me in closer, wrapping his arms around me so that we were both snuggled up for a moment. I love being in Scott’s arms; it’s warmth and safety, and there’s no question as to why or how I fall asleep in seconds when I’m next to him. He is the sweetest man that I have ever met.
Scott’s dad quickly made us some breakfast; scrambled eggs and ham (thank GOODNESS, because I had been eating way too many sweets this Christmas break. It’s really hard for me to resist when the goods are all around me. “Oh well, right? It’s Christmas!” I’d say with a cheeky smile as Scott gave me a disapproving look. I know, I know). Meanwhile, we got bundled up in our snow gear aka until I felt like either 1. a walking marshmallow or 2. a girl wearing one of those sumo wrestler puffy costumes. You pick. It sounds like I’m complaining, but really I was such a lucky girl because Scott’s sister was able to lend me everything that I needed. Also Idahoan Christmas is much more cold than man-made Big Bear in California. So it turned out great.
Scott, Meg and I quickly headed over to Brundage Mountain in McCall, where we’d be skiing and snowboarding for the day. We parked, bought our day-passes, and clicked in our gear. As we went up the ski lift, I was in awe of the amount of snow and beauty that was around me. Colossal pine trees were dressed in white with heavy packs of snow impossibly teetering on each branch. Snow flakes were swiftly brushing past us, collecting onto our scarves and gloves. The higher up the mountain we got, the more we’d fade into a cloud of freezing fog. Soon enough the terminal was in eye sight. I mentally prepared myself for this tricky little thing- to hop off of a moving platform and ski down a narrow hill without tripping on Meg and Scott’s snowboards. I was worrying about this clumsy incident that potentially could have happened in those 5 seconds. So instead of focusing and carefully going through with it, I didn’t move. I didn’t get off of the chair! OK so here’s the thing: As we approached the drop off, my first thought was “oh nooooooo way, no no no, this is much too high and steep of a drop off, let me just wait a millisecond for the chair to move a tad forward. This is just smart”. Well, it never did. The chair veered to the right and looped me around into the direction to go back down the hill. LOL this ALWAYS happens!!! At that moment I was very thankful for modern security, because the chairlift came to a full stop. OF COURSE this would happen! I knew it would. I looked over quickly to Scott and he was smiling at me and giggling. I am so thankful for a lover that laughs with me and doesn’t make me ever feel like I’m a weirdo or failure or an embarrassment. I always feel loved. As we went down the mountain, he’d snowboard down in front of me and wait at the bottom of each section. He’d smile as I skied past him, often saying things like “you go girl!”” You got it!”” Doing great!”. You have no idea how wonderful this was to me. I almost wanted to cry. He did this for the whole day until I got the hang of it and was able to cruise down with him (and still, he’d encourage me). This is such a stark difference of what I used to have. My ex would yell at me to “hurry up” and make me feel like a dumb burden. No one should ever have to be in an abusive relationship like that. There are some great men out there that will treasure you for the gift that you are. Love yourself and do not settle.
On one of the last days in McCall, Scott and I wanted to document the beautiful lush snow that we had surrounding our cabin. So, I threw on the only visually-interesting piece of clothing that I had brought [for Church]- my new ASOS checkered dress. It was below 0 degrees outside, and yet it didn’t matter. I can’t feel cold when I’m in front of the camera. It’s this bizarre focus that enables me to do what I do best, no matter the conditions. I’ve shot in lung-collapsing frozen pools in the desert, oceans in December, cold rains, you name it. Scott also loves to take photographs & he’s very very talented (what can he NOT do? Seriously). It was so fun shooting with him, and I wondered,”why we don’t do it more often?”. After all I AM a model, and he IS a great photographer and loves to collect cameras. You’d think it would be an obvious thing. Then again, maybe not. I don’t feel like a model when I’m around him. I feel like a person. We enjoy each other’s company. But maybe there’s also something exciting that can come from this experience. Later that day, we talked about shooting for brands and collaborating together on projects. Stay tuned and follow us on our journey! Let’s see what happens”.
This trip was so much fun, and I love Idaho. Maybe I’ll live there with a few horses one day. Who knows. I am thankful for the love that Scott and family gives me. I am thankful for the safety that we’ve had throughout these adventures, and for the opportunity to have had them.
P.S. What did you guys do for the holidays? Any exciting trips? Stories?
Comment below, i’d love to read more about them. Sending love.